FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Welcome to my FAQ page, boasting a word count rivalling Tolstoy's War and Peace! (I've told myself a million times not to exaggerate).
Godspeed, curious one. And remember: if you can make it through this page, you can make it through anything. (Including a booking with me, of course)
Q. Do you offer natural services? Eg no condom?
A: I cannae do that, captain. I abide by the Prostitution Reform Act 2003 and only provide safe and legal services.
Q. Do you have a phone number?
A. I sure do, my man. However, I changed my number and made it private in July 2018 and decided to go email only when it comes to initial contact for first time clients. My phone number isn't some huge secret, everyone I've seen in person has my number. Texting is fine, but WhatsApp is even better as it uses wifi when I'm at home. I occasionally experience issues sending and receiving texts due to poor reception where I live.
Q. Do you receive anal, rimming etc?
A. No backdoor shenanigans on me - sorry!
Q. I have been trying to reach you via text...I've seen you before, what's the problem?
A. Please email me and let me know your details - it's likely I no longer have the phone number you're texting. Also, in 2018 I got a new phone and mucked something up in iCloud - not sure what I did exactly but it meant I lost all the numbers I'd saved as contacts. So it's nothing personal I assure you! Just flick me an email and I'll let you know my current number.
Q. How long have you been Gemma Rose for?
A. I started on May 1st, 2017 and worked through to September 2018. I then took a break from October 2018 - June 2019 as I went to the UK in October, came back, went to the UK again in May 2019, blah blah blah. I returned to NZ permanently in June 2019. 2020 was pretty inconsistent too, but that was due to Covid restrictions.
Overall I have been in and out of the industry since 2013 after realising I could no longer hold down a 9-5 for health reasons.
2013 - Paradise Club (agency),
2014- early 2015 The K (brothel)
No sex work from 2015 - 2017
Gemma Rose 2017 - ???
Here's a few pics of me from the olden days.
Q. What do you wear to bookings?
A. A red vinyl mini skirt and a 90's style ringer tee with "Happy Hooker" plastered on the front. No bra, obviously - and boy oh boy, that Wellington chill really makes the ol' nipples stand to attention! You can find me in this getup, sitting in your hotel lobby. Obviously I'll have portable speakers with me, blasting out "Roxanne" by The Police on repeat. I jest, I jest.....I'm generally outcall only, and as discretion is important to me I wear smart casual business wear, typically this is a pair of dress pants/smart jeans, top, and a coat. During the summer months my go-to outfit is a pair of tight jeans, nice top and a leather jacket. Smart lingerie is underneath all of this, of course. If you would prefer me to come in trackpants and puffer jacket (you can take the girl out of the Manawatu but you can't take the Manawatu out of the girl!) then all you have to do is ask!
Q. Do you offer outfit requests / costume / uniform requests eg schoolgirl outfit, nurse etc.
A. I prefer to choose my own outfits because I know what looks best on me. If it's something in the gallery - for sure - but please don't ask me to wear something you don't see me normally wear. It mightn't suit me, and if I don't feel sexy/confident it'll lessen the experience for both of us.
Q. Re sexual activities. What are your boundaries?
Anal, butthole touching, spreading apart of butt cheeks, fingering, biting, scratching, pinching, hair pulling, licking inside ears
Q. Silliest outfit requests you've received?
I can only think of a couple.
An outcall in the middle of winter wearing a black clubbing dress with nothing underneath, a long purple velvet gown (this request was made half an hour before the incall session was due to start!)
Q. Do you give discounts?
A. I feel my rates are reasonable enough already, especially with sessions 90 mins or over. I have a preference for longer sessions which is why I've priced them the way I have. They're already discounted, and it makes no financial sense to put a discount on a discount.
Q. Will you wear makeup for me
A. Yes, I always wear eye makeup in all bookings. I have really sensitive skin and foundations, powders etc have wreaked havoc on my face in the past, so I avoid putting shit on my face. That and the fact that I have zero skills in applying foundation. Gets me down when I have a soul-destroying pimple that's for sure...and covering it up somehow makes it look worse! But eyeshadow, eyeliner, lipstick etc I wear, yes
Q. Can I make a "no makeup" request?
A. You most certainly can!
Q. Will you ever text me out of the blue?
A. Unsolicited contact isn't my jam, and discretion is paramount - so no, no texts, no emails, no bullshit.
Q. Would you enjoy a drink with me in a booking?
A. If you're having one, I would love to join you. As I have my transport sorted, there is no risk of drink driving etc. So....bottoms up!
Q. Can I make a request for you to turn up to our booking in track pants?
A. YESSS! TAKE ME HERE AND NOW, SIR!!!!!!1111111111!!!!!
Alternative answer: Yes
Q. Can I give you a gift as a token of my appreciation?
A. Gifting isn't necessary at all. But, if you insist, a tip would be fantastic and would go a hell of a long way, as would a testimonial. You can text or email it to me after we've met, and I'll type it up on my testimonials page.
Q. Incalls or outcalls? Or both?
A. Door knocking for D has always been my preference, but I recognise the importance of being versatile, now more than ever. So yep, incalls are available too, and I'm happy to be able to offer them.
Q. What happens if we see each other in the street?
A. I'd never approach you first - discretion and privacy is assured.
Q. What do you do with condoms after a booking?
A. I will take the condom away, rinse it out, and hang it on the line to dry, ready to use again on the next lucky man. Just between you and me, since May 1st 2017 I have used the same condom with every man. Please don't tell anyone.
Jokes, bruh. I put them in tissue and chuck them in your bin, or maybe you might prefer to do that for me. Some people have asked that I take the used condom/s with me as they don't want them in their house / hotel bin, and that's fine - I just take them with me and chuck in my own bin
Q. Any STI's?
A. Protection is used at all times and this is non-negotiable. I get tested regularly at NZPC, as should all sex workers. I go in approximately every 3 months and to date I've never tested positive for an STI.
Q. If you had an STI would you let your recent clients know?
A. This would be an awkward and embarrassing conversation, but yes I would; I'm running a business and have responsibilities to uphold.
Q. Any health issues?
A. Lupus, eczema, dermatitis...all at their worst in summer, at which time I tend to go on hiatus / work very infrequently
Q. Do you like it rough?
A. Not really...UNLESS I'm on top, in which case I will assume the role of horny maniac extraordinaire, and ride you into oblivion! I'm in my element on top. A very intense + energetic experience for all parties involved
Q. Do you see clients with disabilities? How do you treat them?
A. I prefer to use the term "differently abled", and yes I have experience with clients who are differently abled. When approaching me for a session please let me know more information, so I can get an idea of what your body is capable of enjoying.
If you are differently abled in an intellectual way all I ask is that you have an understanding of the nature of my work and what I provide.
I find that the majority of my differently abled clients don't need special treatment and don't want to be viewed any differently to other clients bar consideration for their individual needs. But, I would employ that same consideration with anyone else as a normal part of my job (eg, a client who was especially shy, anxious, overweight etc etc).
Unfortunately my incall location is not wheelchair friendly.
Q. Are you LBGTQ friendly?
Q. Will you boot me out as soon as I've blown my load?
A. Haha, that would just be rude! Besides, the majority of my bookings are outcalls, so if you want me gone after you've climaxed then you'll have to do the booting! I won't be offended.
The way I see it, you've paid for a certain amount of time and I intend on giving you the time you've paid for, and I'm going to stay for the whole duration. If time (and other factors haha) allow for another round, then that's fine - or if you just want to have a cuddle or a cuppa then that's fine too!
Q. Are multi shots allowed?
Q. Most embarrassing escorting experiences?
A. Plenty! Here are a few of the tamer ones. The truly cringeworthy stories are best told in person ;)
1) A lunch date at the Wellington library cafe, where the client was really loudly and enthusiastically boasting about the size of his daughters breasts. I shit you not. Being a busy lunchtime the place was packed and people could absolutely hear him...people were staring...looks of disapproval abound...I was cringing so hard that I felt like collapsing into myself and turning into a black hole.
2) Another lunch date (are they cursed?) at a tightly packed cafe/restaurant in Wellington, where the client loudly broadcasted my profession, and kept referring to it over the duration of the meal. People next to us heard for sure - we were packed in like sardines. The waiter (who kept coming over to fuck around with cutlery, water etc) also heard. My face was redder than the CCP.
3) An outcall at a hotel...went directly to the hotel from my house with no stops. I had taken the payment and reached into my bag to get my condom pouch, whilst maintaining eye contact and chatting with the client. Trying to be classy and all that jazz. I reach for the condom pouch and felt something cold and slimy on my hand. Dammit, the lube had leaked, I thought. My hand still in the bag, I had a look and what did I see? A slimy brown slug! Wtf? I lived in a typical unhealthy Wellington rental at the time, but slugs were never a problem in the house....so how had one got into my hooker handbag? For slugs' sake! Whilst still chatting and maintaining eye contact with the client (and my hand still in the bag) I managed to wrap the slug in a supermarket docket, then when I took my shower I brought my bag into the bathroom with me, and dumped the slimy offender (and potential cockblocker, if the client had seen!) in the bin. A sluggin' sureal experience, without a doubt.
4) My first dinner date. The client was telling me about his visit to Jim Morrison's grave in Paris and I was listening intently, so intently in fact that I hadn't noticed that the end of my ponytail was swimming in a pool of beef au jus....
Q. Do you see older clients?
A. I am happy to - all ages (18+) are welcome - however I can count the amount of clients I've seen aged 65+ on one hand. Must be the tattoos....
Q. What age range are your clients?
A. The majority seem to be in the 35 - 55 age range. Anyone 18+ or over is welcome though.
Q. Have you ever done a couples booking?
A. YES! And I love doing them, as reflected in my couples rates structure. Check my testimonials page for reviews from some of the lovely couples I've seen.
Q. Does the GFE start when a booking is confirmed?
A. The GFE starts when I knock on your door. Bookings shouldn't take more than a handful of emails to organise.
Q. Can I pay you in drugs?
A. Lol, considering I don't even do drugs and never have (apart from weed occasionally)...the answer is no. The only form of payment I take is New Zealand dollars in cash, payable upon commencement of booking
Q. How regularly do you smoke weed?
A. I have only smoked it a handful of times in my life. Less than 10 times I'm sure.
Q. What instances do I need to make a deposit?
A. None currently as I no longer offer overnighters to new clients.
Q. Ever had a lady book you?
A. No. I have had a handful of inquiries and they've all turned out to be timewasters, or have ghosted me upon my saying I'm available to see them. Odd...
Q. Would you do a MMF?
A. If I'd met at least one of the two males previously, then yeah, sure. I would do this for $600 for 1 hour, incall or outcall. Making this up as I go along btw...no one would book this I'm sure
Q. What happens if you cancel?
A. If I do need to cancel you will be given as much notice as possible as well as a discount off your next booking.
Q. What's your take on street workers?
I don't really have a "take" on them? They're just...sex workers who work on the street?
If you're angling for me to shit on street workers then you're out of luck I'm afraid. I'm many things...but I'm not a snob, and I would not - and do not - look down on any worker, whether they be indoors or outdoors. At the end of the day we all suck D for $.
Q. Ever been hurt on the job
Q. Do you talk a lot when you're nervous?
The opposite. I talk a lot when I'm feeling relaxed and at ease :)
Q. Can we meet at the bar for a drink first?
A. We can do if you really want to, but please be aware that my time starts the moment we meet.
Q. Do you give anal?
A. I love strap ons!
Q. Do you see virgins?
A. Yes, I have seen several virgins - if you are new to sex please let me know prior, so I don't make things awkward by making assumptions etc.
Q. Have you ever done an international fly me to you?
A. I have done fly me to you's but as of yet they've all been in New Zealand, and all with people I have met previously. Most FMTY are 24 hours but in November 2020 I had one for 48 hours.
I am not currently available for international fly me to you bookings.
Q. Easiest way to make you orgasm?
A. Oral on me...all about that clit! Licking is the way to go. In other words, if you're a purveyor of pussy/connoiseur of c*nt, you'd do well to book a session with me. Occasionally I also come during penetrative sex - but only when I'm on top, grinding down on your rock hard rod!! Oohhhhhh
Q. How about fingering?
A. If you're after an orgasm and genuine pleasure, I find that the tongue works best on me. Fingering can often be painful and lead to thrush or BV, which then means a loss of income as I can't work. I have not had a single episode of thrush or BV since I disallowed fingering in 2019.
Q. Do you shower before a booking?
A. Absolutely, I will arrive at your outcall location showered, and I have a quick freshen up once I've arrived too.
Q. How do I pay you?
A. At the very start of the booking we'll "get the paperwork out of the way" and then get down to the GOOD TIMES!
Q. Do you count the money once it's been given to you? Sorry but that puts me off.
A. I count the money because the one time I didn't, I was shorted $100 (by a then regular client)
Another time, when counting, I noticed a client had given me $50 extra. When making him aware of this he admitted he had purposely done this "as a test" to "see if I was honest", and then he took the extra $50 back.
Q. Do I have to email you to make another booking?
A. All first-time clients need to book through email, yeah, and I'll give you my phone number after that if you prefer texting.
Q. Why email only initially?
A. I went email only in 2018 and have never looked back. Being email only has cut down the amount of bullshit enquiries drastically. I don't miss having my phone number plastered online, and I don't miss waking up to a slew of missed calls, and texts sent in the middle of the night ("U up?")
Q. Will you participate in a gang bang?
Q. Do you get time wasters over email too? Or was it just through text.
A. A fuck tonne of time wasters over text, definitely not as many over email...but there are a still a few, yeah
Q. Can you send me some pics that aren't in your gallery?
A. Can you send me some money that isn't in my bank account?
Q. Can we go to McDonalds for our dinner date?
A. Fast food doesn't agree with me, if you get what I mean. It's a lose-lose situation: goes in one end and out the other shortly after and then I'm hungry again. (Ahh...the Gemma Rose FAQ...it's oversharing central round here isn't it...)
Q. Can we do the dinner date at my place? I'm a whiz in the kitchen!
A. Oh, are you? That makes one of us! Yes, I am fine to do the dinner date at your place. Doesn't have to be anything flash either. The only caveat is I can't really cope with hard/crunchy food.
Q. What does a typical Gemma Rose booking look like?
A. Chat, drinks (optional), laughs, and fun in the bedroom. Companionship as well as intimacy in equal measure.
Q. Do you do car bookings?
Q. For dinner dates, can we do the bedroom component first?
A. YES! Please, for the love of God, yes!!!!!! I would very much prefer this. Nothing worse than riding dick when you've bloated up like Violet Beauregarde
Q. What don't you look for when selecting a client?
Race, weight, age (18+), appearance etc are of no consequence to me.
Q. Do you prefer incalls or outcalls?
I'm in the minority but I actually prefer outcalls. Feels more exciting lol
Q. Why are your incalls limited to 30 and 60 mins only?
For incalls, I pay to hire a room at an apartment, paying X amount for the duration of the incall booking. The room hire fee for 30 min and 60 min incall bookings is the same. However, after that the fee increases. It would be unreasonable for me to offer extended incall encounters at the same price as my extended duration outcall prices.
Rather than take the financial hit, or choose to pass on the costs to you, I have chosen not to offer 90 min / 2 hour / 3 hour incalls at all.
Q. Can you remember your first booking as Gemma?
An Aussie chap, 90 mins. Nice guy, polite and respectful, just the way I like 'em. I had $24.90 to my name, so I was pretty much in awe of the $260 (my 90 min rate in 2017) I had just earned. Splashed out on a loaf of gluten free bread that's for sure, and put the rest towards surviving. Was so fuckin' grateful for the money, and I still am, in every single booking.
Q. Most unusual places you've had a booking?
A. I've only done bookings in houses and hotels. However I've had some odd requests in my time, though - cars, behind a bush at a park, in a treehouse that wasn't even on the enquirers' property (!!!!!), in an office, in a vacated commercial building. There was talk of a booking on a moored boat, but it never eventuated
Q. It's fun to play at the Y-M-C-A
A. I don't doubt it for a single millisecond...however for my own comfort I do not provide outcalls to youth hostels / backpackers / dormitory style set-ups. Thanks for your understanding!
Q. Can I smoke during our sessions?
A. If it's an outcall at your house, then sure man, whatever. I'll not be offended. I trust you intend on washing your hands+mouthwashing after your cheeky durry :)
Q. Do you smoke?
A. No. I smoked rollies for many years, but quit and took up vaping in November 2017.
Q. Are you a stoner?
A. No. I've tried it a handful of times in my life and didn't mind it. Have no problem with weed and those who wish to use it in a booking can feel free (in outcalls)
Q. Can we drink alcohol together?
A. You know it my dude!
Vodka, whiskey, gin...the possibilities are endless! This hussy ain't fussy.
Q. I want to book you for a Couples session as a surprise for my wife. That okay?
A. Sorry, no - not as a surprise.
It's absolutely imperative that your wife is aware of the proposed booking and consents to it. Likewise if you are a wife and wanting to surprise your husband. All parties need to be aware and consenting.
Q. How do you avoid timewasters? Also, are you picky with clients?
A. Timewasters: Can only try to mitigate as best I can and on the odd occasion I've been off the mark. I'm not infallible...unfortunately!
When it comes to being picky with clients: I only reply to polite and respectful inquiries which give me the information I ask for (see "Make A Booking" area on the front page of this site)
Race, weight, appearance, age (18+) are of no consequence to me.
All I ask for is a polite introduction along with the initial details I need from you: duration, your preferred time, incall / outcall (and if the latter, your general location / suburb). Polite and informative communication goes a long way in creating a fantastic first impression - it's also guaranteed a reply. Messages that do not meet expectations will be ignored.
Short notice booking requests are ignored because it's stated everywhere that I require at least 12 hours' notice. If that's been ignored...what else have they ignored? It mightn't seem like a big deal, but trust me...it actually is.
"I know you ask for notice but I thought I'd try anyway" - also ignored
Also I do tend to tune out pretty quickly if I feel like getting basic information from you (name, location etc) is comparable to drawing blood from a stone; it shouldn't take several back and forth emails to get the information that I need from you and would much rather engage with someone who can communicate effectively from the very start. Don't forget - I have gone to great lengths to provide you with extensive details about myself and the services I offer - yet I know nothing about you - at all.
Also, if you have any further questions / requests feel free to mention - I know this FAQ is extensive but I'm not going to bite your head off if there's something you've missed! My screening is rigid because 1) I need to feel safe and 2) I need to feel as sure as I can be that we are the right match, because a good connection really enhances a booking!
Q. Do I need to give you my specific address in my first communication to you?
A. No, but I will need your general location (suburb) in that first email. Then when I get back to you and we're about to confirm, I'll ask for your address. If it's at a hotel/motel I can easily find the address online :)
Q. Do I need to give you my real name?
A. Not at all! But you do need to give me a name.
Q. I know you don't offer anal on you but would you consider it, just for me?
A. No. No backdoor shenanigans on me. There are some workers who offer this, usually at an extra charge. Good luck with your search!
Q. Can I take photos/videos of you/us in a session?
Q. I don't require "full service" by way of penetrative sex but keen on oral etc. How much for an hour?
A. $280 as per my "Services and Rates" page, incall only
Any in-person booking, regardless of nudity and/or sexual interaction, requires my non-negotiable, advertised fee.
No discount will be given on a fee that we both know is already more than fair.
Q. What's your cheapest rate?
A. $150 per hour dinner / drinking date (social), or a cheeky 30 min tap n' gap for $180 at my incall
Q. Which duration do you recommend for first timers?
A. Outcalls: 90 mins - 2 hours, Incalls: 1 hour.
Q. Which durations are the most popular?
A. I find that 90 mins and 2 hour outcalls are my most popular durations.
Q. What's the story with the 90 min outcall permanent special rate?
A. A few months after I started hooking I decided I wanted to attract longer bookings. Not long after, I did the same thing with 2 hour bookings. Both are perfect durations! Time flies when you're having fun.
At the time of writing this (November 26 2020) I have had zero 1 hour outcalls this year. My last 1 hour outcall was in September 2019.
Edit 24/2/21: 1 hour outcalls are no longer available
Q. I can't afford you...what are my options?
A. Wellington is teaming with escorts - you could shop around to find someone at a rate that suits your budget, or perhaps you could put some money aside each payday and save up?
Q. Do you shave your body hair?
Q. May I offer you a box of chocolates?
A. I appreciate the gesture, but I'd have to politely pass. Hashtag weight loss journey etc etc etc
Q. Do you do CBT?
A. No. If I offered that, I would list it. I did do this in mistress bookings when I first entered the industry, and fucken hated it.
Q. I am a man of colour...is this a problem? Yes or no.
A. NO, and would never be. I'm sad that this even needs to be asked. Please, anyone else who is reading this...there is no reason to mention this in your communication with me.
Q. Would you be happy to vouch for me if another escort required it?
A. Yes, I can be a reference for you. Just let me know prior, and give the escort my email address and
have them contact me.
Q. I wear an ankle bracelet right now...is this a problem
Q. I'd feel more comfortable if I left my t-shirt on during any physical interaction. Is that okay?
A. Yes, of course!
Q. Why do you wear a scrunchy on your wrist?
A. I like to have a scrunchy on hand (well, on wrist) to tie up my hair when giving you what will hopefully be a glorious blowjob.
Q. Do you sell content (custom clips etc)
I fully appreciate the merits of diversification - the more side hustles the better - but content creation just isn't something I can get excited over - I don't have the talent or the motivation to hustle online for minimal pay, and privacy is a huge concern. My heart wouldn't be in it, and this would translate on camera for sure.
Don't misconstrue this - I'm not shitting on content creators in any way. I'm just being honest in saying that for me personally, creating videos/camming isn't of any interest to me, and it's something I wouldn't authentically enjoy.
Doorknocking for D and face to face interaction is where I'm at :)
Q. When is your actual birthday?
A. My legitimate birthday is December 3rd.
Birthday greetings/wishes would be meaningless to me if given on a different day. Just a "happy birthday" means more to me than anyone realises...and that's why I personally choose to have my actual birthday as my hooker birthday.
Q. When will you come to (insert town/city here)
A. Whenever you pay to fly me to you!
Q. Hi Emma, how do I book?
A. Hiya. On the front page of my website I have instructions on how to book, in a text box for added visibility. All of my advertisements also state how to book. (Name, booking duration, location). Too easy! Cheers, Gemma
Q. I know you prefer some notice but can I see you right now?
Q. Would you cancel on a new client if a regular wanted to book at the same time.
A. Nah, it's first come first served - if a new client booked for a certain time, and it's confirmed...then the time is theirs.
However, I can definitely try and make something work for a regular if they're open to another time. This has happened a few times in the past and in some cases I've worked past my advertised hours to accommodate them.
Q. What is your kink?
A. Sex with strangers + door knocking for D
Q. I prefer an all inclusive GFE, so what's with the optional extras?
Apart from Shower Fun (which is certainly intimate) I feel that the rest of my optional extras don't fall into the GFE category.
Toy shows, strap-ons, spanking, golden showers, anal play definitely all deviate from my standard service so they incur an additional fee.
Q. You mention you used to work at The K. Is that The Kensington Inn?
I did one shift there in early 2013 but got a bad vibe from the then owner. I went back in 2014 after a change of ownership and worked there all of 2014 through to early 2015.
I did the day shift (9.30am - 7pm). Yeah the place was falling apart, and the prices weren't great, but the people...they really made the place. Kelly the receptionist, Byron the driver, Willow, Nikki, Carmen, Lucca-Jay to name just a few. A long time ago now.
Q. What is your most popular day for bookings?
It seems to change each year. 2020 was Sunday. 2019 it was Wednesday, but that day is now deader than a dodo's doo doo for me. 2018 it was Thursday. 2017...I cannae remember lol. In 2021 so far it seems to be Saturday!
Q. Why do you want to enjoy yourself too when you work?
Because I deserve to enjoy myself too?
Nobody gains by going through the motions.
Q. Why do you like longer bookings?
Because I like to relax and take my time - I enjoy the emotional element of a date as much as the physical. Having a chat, having a laugh at the beginning relaxes us both, gives us the time to build a connection. This absolutely enhances our bedroom time. That being said, I have no problem with the shorter bookings either. If I did, I wouldn't offer them
Q. Do you give yourself days off?
Yes. Resetting/recharging is crucial!
Q. How much notice do people give you?
I ask for a minimum 12 hours notice, which is fine, but I find that most people come through the week before. (Which is even better as it gives me an idea of what the week ahead will look like)
Q. Do you have PIV sex in your Shower Fun extra
No! Just lathering up each other, hand jobs, kissing etc. No shower sex.
Q. Why aren't you on NZG?
I've never advertised with them.
I know my capabilities and to keep things fun and to continue to give my all into every single experience,
I have chosen to be low volume, and have a limit of 2 sessions per available day. Also bear in mind the majority of my bookings are 90 min + 2 hour outcalls.
I'm happy with the amount of bookings I get per week on average, always have been, and I don't want/need to advertise for more work than I can handle. NZG is currently the most popular NZ directory with the biggest reach, and would be ideal for those wanting to work high volume, especially those who prefer incalls and can easily have several clients come in and out each day.
If you want shitloads of steady work, it makes sense to advertise with them.
It just doesn't work for me.
Q. Do you get your phone out in bookings?
No, that's rude
Q. Have you ever had your phone ring in a booking?
My phone is permanently on silent + do not disturb, 24 hours a day 7 days a week.
I have had clients whose phones have gone off in bookings, and when this happens I encourage them to take the call - could be their work, or a loved one etc. I remain silent during the call obviously, and if possible I might go and wait in the bathroom. Best to take the call to avoid suspicion I say. I won't be offended at all
Q. Your favourite position?
I'm in my element when I'm on top and in control, riding your dick into oblivion
Q. Are you aware that your real life details could come up on others' social media?
Yes, I have heard anecdotally that client's names / workers names can pop up as suggested friends on Facebook and the like.
I don't have Facebook, so don't have the app, nor do I have any other social media app.
Twitter is the only form of social media I have, but even so I don't have the Twitter app - I just log in via Twitter's mobile site.
Q. Do you employ a traffic light safe word system for your spanking sessions?
Very much YES! I've only had one person, ever, book my spanking extra though lol. Uh oh!
Q. You seem to swear a lot on here...can I expect that in a booking too?
Not necessarily. There's no denying I have a foul mouth, but I try to "read the room"...if you start swearing first, then I'll see that as permission granted to start effing here and there as well.
However: the F-bomb may well be dropped upon orgasm (I always appreciate a good O!) and I apologise in advance. I really can't help it.
Q. If/when you retire will you stop seeing clients altogether?
No, I would always continue to see repeat clients who I genuinely like and want to spend time with.
Q. Ever turned up to a booking commando?
Nope, but I have left several bookings commando hahaha. (Some choose to buy the panties I'm wearing...I know about this in advance yet ALWAYS seem to forget to bring another pair to change into!)
Q. How do you obtain FAQ's?
In-person conversations, email conversations, and some I have made up myself.
I've purposely been straightforward and open with my opinions, personality, preferences etc - I need to know we'll be a good match and if you make it through the FAQ's and you're still interested, then there's a 99.9% chance we'll have an amazing time together.
Q. Your social media links please
My Twitter handle is @GemmaRoseNZ, although I can go for weeks without logging in. I have no other social media accounts, never have. Actually, wait...I have a personal Reddit account for lurking on r/newzealand lol
Q. So are you saying you get zero time wasters via email?
I still get time wasters on email but nowhere near as many as I did when I had my number posted online
Q. Can you tell when someone hasn't read your ad / your website?
Yes! One example would be the guy who has been emailing me once every few months since July 2019, asking how much 2 hours would cost. This can easily be found on my ads as well as the services and rates page - he can't be fucked to read an ad / click a button so I can't be fucked replying *evil laughter*
Q. What is the deadest month for you?
In MY experience I would pick February. Might get a handful at the beginning but as soon as Valentines Day hits it goes dead and doesn't recover until March.
Q. What is the busiest month for you?
March, July, October, November
Q. What do you think about providers offering a "menu"?
A contentious issue among providers to be sure.......
Although no two bookings are the same, I do like to include a list of suggested activities as part of my GFE, because I want to be as clear as possible to you what I offer.
Q. Have you ever had a client pass away?
I don't know :(
There are definitely a few who I think about from time to time - especially people I saw very regularly and then boom - nothing.
Q. I have met you a few times, and although I still intend to see you from time to time, I also enjoy punting with other ladies. Is that okay?
Of course it is! I don't own you!
Storytime: I saw a man a total of two times (lol), and a few weeks later he contacted me to say he couldn't see me anymore as he had met with another provider who had asked him to be "exclusive" to her. Odd.
Q. Most clients you've seen in a day?
7, working day shift at a brothel, just before Christmas in 2014. $700 in hand after the brothel took their cut.
In September 2017 as Gemma I had a one off "incall day" at a hotel, where I worked from 2.30pm - midnight, saw 5 guys. That was okay. It's easier to work at a higher volume for incalls.
Q. How do we go about meeting in the hotel lobby? Do you promise to be discreet? What will happen?
Typically, I'll burst into the hotel lobby decked in sweat and my hair messed up due to the unforgiving Wellington southerly.
I'll then pause for a brief moment, before pounding my fists against my chest, huffing and puffing and chanting "Loud and proud, bitches! Palmy represent! Natural Double D tiddies!" over and over again.
Now that I've got everyone's attention I then announce to the world: "Hey, I'm Gemma - a rough diamond from Palmy originally, but here in Wellington to ride dick in hotels, motels, and private residences! You won't know of me as I barely advertise anywhere but nevertheless I'm a hoe by name and nature and tonight I'm here to give (your name and room number) a right royal rogering! Fuck yeah!"
All eyes are on me as I then jump over the reception desk, an offensive fart escaping me in the process. Should've laid off the Kellogg's All Bran...ahh well, never mind. I retrieve a red light out of my handbag and go about plugging it into the nearest power outlet. That way, when you come down out of the lift you'll see me under a red light - your own special, smelly Roxanne! You simply can't miss me!!
I notice a staff member has a telephone in his hand - who is he gonna call? Ghostbusters? The police? M-m-mental health? I don't want to find out - suddenly very self-aware, I high tail it out of there, turning my phone off as soon as I'm a safe distance away. I'll text you to cancel a few days after the fact. *shrugs*
Python-esque situations aside now...the reality is that privacy and discretion is as important to me as it is to you!
I don't dress or act in a way that would draw attention, and I have never experienced any issues in reception.
Clothing-wise, for outcall bookings I wear exactly what I would wear in a vanilla job. I'm not a frumpy dresser, but nor am I a provocative one. Clothes are one of the few things I don't cheap out on - I like quality NZ made stuff that lasts a lifetime if taken care of properly.
I can give you my word that your privacy and discretion is assured. I'm not ashamed of what I do, but I'm a private person and our rendezvous is no one else's business.
If you want to meet in the hotel lobby, just flick me a text when you're in the actual lobby and, as if by magic, I will appear right away. Usually I meet people outside the hotel, and we go through together. Or, we meet in the bar, where you will already be, and I walk through and join you. It's rare these days to find a hotel that isn't carded but if it's card free then I can go straight up to your room!
I have never, in 3 years and counting, encountered any issues in hotel reception areas. Please don't worry - discretion is something I take very seriously! I'm a professional and I act as such. We are all good.
Q. Wait...you have toys now? What/when/who/where/why!!!
These are surreal times we're living in, man. For pretty much the past three years I've been all "i'LL gEt ToYs SoOn"...and in August 2020 soon became now.
Adding toys to the mix has been on my sex worker bucket list for the longest time. 2020 has been a challenging year for me, and I have had a lot of spare time to think about the future of Gemma Rose. I decided that the time to tick off this bucket list item was NOW.
Q. How are you finding the working climate in the age of Covid?
“And I? May I say nothing, my Lord?” - Oscar Wilde
Q. What guarantees can you make in a booking?
Guarantees? Well, nothing in life is guaranteed my esteemed dude, apart from death, taxes and the inevitable return of Freddy Krueger....but I can guarantee you that:
- There won't be any awkward silences
- What happens and what is said in the room...stays in the room
- I won't send you any unsolicited texts or emails post-booking
- I will do my best to make sure you have a good time
- We will have a safe + responsible time
- I'll make sure your comfort is a priority. When I'm on top (my favourite!!) I do tend to vary the tempo - slow and sensual, a good hard pounding with boobies bouncing all over the show, then switching back to slow...etc etc. I check in with you often and ask that you let me know if you want me to slow down (or to go faster!)
- my jokes will make you laugh. Or cringe. Probably both!
Q. What do you think surprises clients when they see you?
Well, I hope there aren't any surprises because I have gone to great lengths to be as transparent as possible on this website, ensuring you are as informed about me as you could possibly be before even meeting me.
I know have a formal style of writing though, and I wonder if that causes me to come across as boring, militant, pussy harder to get into than Fort Knox etc etc.
I'm pretty laid back in person, I promise! AND...I'm extremely well mannered!
Q. What can I expect upon meeting you (outcall)
A. You can expect me to arrive at your hotel (or your place) immaculately dressed - after all, discretion is important to us both. If we are meeting at a hotel we'll likely be meeting outside because the lifts are carded. I will greet you with a hug and we will go up the lifts to the privacy of your room where the good times will most certainly roll.
If your hotel isn't carded, I'll come up to your room and just loiter outside your door for a while, soaking up the atmosphere and ensuring enough people walk past. Then I'll find a power outlet in the hallway to set up a microphone/amp, and use it to finally announce my arrival to you, via a rap: "knock knock knock I'm here for your cock, open the door or you'll be motherfuckin' blocked!"
Just kidding. If your hotel isn't carded I'll just come up to your room and knock on your door. You'll let me in, and the good times will start from behind that all-important closed door
Q. I'd like to take you out to dinner but I'm worried you'll use foul language
I never swear in public places
Q. Did you get booking requests during lockdown?
A. I went on hiatus just before the first Level 3 (March), and didn't check my emails until mid May. When I finally logged in, there were 163 booking requests. All were from randoms. I clicked "select all" and deleted. Some of the emails were even sent in level 4.........................
Q. Do we have to have sex during our time together?
Not at all.
Essentially I charge for my time*, irrespective of what may/may not happen during that time.
Of course due to the nature of my work it's implied/assumed that sexual activity of some description would be taking place, but it certainly doesn't have to. You may be surprised how often it doesn't!
*With the exception of my "optional extras" (shared shower, toys etc)
Do you charge an outcall fee?
The rate you see is what you pay, there are no outcall fees on top. I'm about 12-20 mins by car from the CBD depending on traffic, it's no trouble. If I lived outside of Wellington, or indeed outside of the Greater Wellington region, it would make sense to charge an outcall fee, but I'm reasonably close by at this point in time so there's no need. Actually if/when I leave Wellington it'd probably make more sense to just be incall only?
Q. Any tattoos and/or piercings?
Piercings: I went through an "I'M so000O eDgY" period in my late teens, which involved me wearing a Paul Frank "I love punk" t-shirt with the PF monkey on it, tartan mini skirts adorned with safety pins, and getting my tongue pierced in three different places (piercings all in a line). I even tried to get into the music of the Sex Pistols, based solely on their amazing graphic designs. Once I actually put on their music though...jeepers...realised it was a bridge too far, and I snapped out of my poser punk phase forthwith.
The tongue piercings would be well closed by now - it's been over a decade!
Ears are pierced with two holes in one and five in the other. I usually put studs in a few times a year to check the holes are still open. But typically I don't wear earrings at all. Just not my thing! In fact the only jewellery I wear is my watch, a silver bear ring, and a couple of locally designed onyx cocktail rings. Onyx is soooo my bitch!
Tattoos: I now declare this can of worms officially opened!!!
1. I have a small tattoo on my ankle. I got it zapped once by a laser but it hurt so much being on the ankle that I decided to keep it after all. The laser session buggered it ever so slightly
2. An expertly done, tear-inducingly awesome tattoo on my upper arm, of a cat + roses + lace doily, which is a coverup of an old tattoo
3. A tattoo on my inner forearm, again a cover up of an old tattoo that had been removed by laser. This was originally a solid black tattoo. On my final laser removal session the technician unfortunately did not adjust the settings on the machine and I was left with severe burns that took months to heal. Ultimately it faded into a white, raised scar.
Although it was just a mistake and I hold no ill will toward the technician, I was pretty upset by it all the same, especially as it was my final laser session. So I figured it'd be best to camouflage the scar by way of a coverup tattoo...what a mistake that turned out to be. Decided on a continuation of the roses+lace theme, this time with a spider web and some garden insects instead of a cat. Different artist because the artist who did tattoo #2 was booked out for months upon months. I hate this one with a burning passion. Despite researching the artist, reading reviews, browsing his portfolio, paying a shitload of money, and being assured he could match the colours of my other tattoo, I felt I was left with a design that was poorly executed. The remorse I felt was pretty overwhelming, and it goes without saying that the experience took a massive toll on me, which is one of the reasons why I only worked infrequently from December 2020 through to early February 2021. But at the end of the day it is what it is - no point in "coulda shoulda woulda", nothing I can do about it now except to keep it covered so I don't have to look at the damn thing, and know that one day it'll be gone.
I had my first laser removal session on 2nd March 2021 with a different laser technician. Disclosure: I have the tattoo partially covered in and out of bookings. Half out of embarrassment, and half due to the fact that having it covered can optimise healing between laser sessions. Having it covered has worked wonders and has made me feel more like myself again. It's given me my mojo back. If I can continue to afford it, I can knock out 5 more sessions this year at 8 week intervals. At some point in 2022 it'll be gone, or as good as.
Here are some pictures of my upper arm cover up (the one I actually like!). No pictures of the other one until its gone...however if you're curious I can show you in person.
Q. Hey beautiful like to see ya sometime for outdoorsy walk around with panties or without and flash your butt as you walk in front of me and I with a massive erection in my pants and I follow you saying must have pussy, feed me. Sounds like something you would consider. Text me (number removed) the park I would like to explore with you is Queen Elizabeth Park Paraparaumu FYI.
It's a no from me, champ. But good luck in your quest!
Q. I came across your old Tumblr site and it had your phone number on it tee hee hee :)
Yeah, it has the 027 number that I stopped using in July 2018 :)
As telco's recycle their numbers after a certain amount of time, I imagine you've well and truly been blocked by whoever you've been texting...coz it ain't me. If you had actually booked me since July 2018 you'd know the new number........
Note to readers: When I first started as Gemma I had a free Tumblr site. It served me well for the first few months, before one day I noticed my phone was absolutely dead - checked my website and Tumblr had implemented some login shit whereby only Tumblr members could view my site due to the naughty nature of my services.
I bought a domain and hosting that same day, loaded up Photoshop, and had my new website online a few days later.
Q. Ever cried in front of a client?
Q. I want to know the real you...you seem more interesting than Gemma.
A. Wtf? If you've spent more than five minutes at my website or met me in person then you already DO know the real me. Gemma IS me, albeit with a different name for privacy/security/stigma reasons. Do you think I'd go to such a great effort on my website just to curate a fake personality in the hopes of money? Never gonna be that desperate, matey.
What you see is what you get - and I've gone to great lengths to try to convey that on my website.
I can't sustain a fake personality, so I don't bother trying.
It's 100% easier + more natural just to be myself.
I'm well aware that I'm not everyone's cup of tea, and that's okay!
Q. Why do you no longer want to see me? I thought we got on so well.
(name removed for privacy), we sure did, until you randomly stuck your finger up my asshole and didn't even apologise after the fact
Q. What are your fears?
Homelessness, death of loved ones, receiving a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris, the usual.
Q. Neil Young or Neil Diamond?
Alternative answer: Neil Young. I have "Heart of Gold", "Hey Hey My My" and "Harvest Moon" on my Apple Music. Neil Young is fab. As for Neil Diamond...not so much...I'm aware of him, just a little schmaltzy for my tastes is all. His music doesn't offend me / generate feelings of unbridled rage and hatred, just not my cup of tea I guess.
Q. First ever band you loved as a kid?
The first band I got into was The Monkees, aged around 10. TV2 played re-runs of their TV show. I had a friend the same age as me who was also into them, Davy Jones was her Monkees boyfriend and mine was Mike Nesmith. One day my Mum decided to inform me that The Monkees didn't write their own songs, nor play their own instruments?! I was shook. I'd also recently had a falling out with the Monkees friend. Feeling pretty disappointed at this stage, not gonna lie.
The straw that really broke the camel's back, though, was The Chatroom Incident.
I'd discovered the official chatroom at The Monkees website. Word was that occasionally a Monkee himself would enter the chat. I'd load up the chatroom every now and then in the hopes of Monkee spotting, and then sure enough, one day Peter Tork (the blonde one) entered the chat.
Starstruck, I typed a greeting to him, saying where I was from and how old I was. I ended the intro with "So how does it feel to be a celebrity"?
This triggered him big time and he turned on me. Sadly I can't remember what he said verbatim as this occurred over 20 years ago and I didn't take a screenshot, but he essentially took major offence to me calling a celebrity a celebrity, told me the internet was poisoning my mind, and told me to get out of the chatroom and go back to my homework.
To cut a long story short I didn't respond well to this scolding: you best believe I hit that caps lock button, and F bombs were dropped with reckless abandon. (By me). Got banned from the chatroom as a result, stopped listening to The Monkees and took up with the Spice Girls instead! A few years later in my early teens I moved onto The Beatles.
Q. Ever had a famous client?
Privacy? Discretion? Pssh! No one else is reading this eh, just you and me? Promise?
Had this ginger haired British chap as a regular a couple of years back. Absolute unit of a fulla. (Weight is inconsequential to me, just an observation is all.)
Booked 90 mins once a week, often with the "Shower Fun" and "Vibrating Butt Plug" optional extras.
I remember him saying that he had been married like, six times? My heart went out to him, if I'm honest - I know not everyone is suited to marriage.
Loved loved loved Greensleeves, he'd insist on having it playing in the background while exploring the butt plug's 10 levels of vibration. I'm all "Hey Henry, that's the Mr Whippy song!". This was met with a blank expression.
Unfortunately he ended up catching feelings for me and suggested we get wed. Not gonna lie - the riches, jewels and titles appealed to me, as did the prospect of living in a healthy home.
The offer was....royally...appealing, however I knew I couldn't accept.
Things went south as he just couldn't handle the rejection. He even went as far as to text me threats including having me sent to a tower and arranging for my beheading. Zero tolerance for bullshit so I had to block him.
The strangest thing happened a few months later when I went to London. I saw a fricken portrait of this guy hanging in a gallery. That was him, to a tee! What really got me though was the year of death: 1547. Crazy times eh? Even crazier if it were actually true :)
Q. What's your ideal breakfast?
I haven't eaten breakfast in like, 15 years. Definitely not hungry at that time of day! Seem to do okay without it, if my long distance walking + energy in bookings is anything to go by. Stuff that people might have for breakfast is what I might like for dinner sometimes...like scrambled eggs+bacon, hash browns etc. Porridge is a nice snack, hold the sugar
Q. Coffee or tea? How do you like it?
I don't drink coffee, but I love tea! Strong with just a touch of milk, hold the sugar. Don't recall ever having had a bad cup of tea made by you fullas. There's an art to making it, as you well know. You guys have it down pat and I blimmin' love it.
Q. What's your watch? Noticed it in photos but can't make out the specifics
There is a watch in some of the 2018 pics in the Gallery, that was a Tissot PR100 (women's), and 2019 onwards the watch with the blue dial is a Tag Heuer Aquaracer (women's)
Q. What happened to the VIP 90 min rate?
In early 2021 I disestablished the VIP area due to a security breach.
$300 for 90 mins is now accessible to everyone (for as long as I'm based in Wellington)
Q. Are you dominant in the bedroom??
It would seem that way!
Q. Who did you use to make your intro video?
No one, I got a 90 day free trial of Final Cut Pro so I made it myself. I used Final Cut Pro and Motion years ago when I had my network of YouTube channels. I'm quietly hoping to buy it after the trial ends, but it's like $499, and what with laser tattoo removal + constantly being cockblocked by Covid alert level yo-yo-ing, there's only so much extra money in the kitty you know what I'm sayin'..........
It's a "nice to have", but not an essential. There's always iMovie, although going from FCP to iMovie would be like going from a Bugatti Chiron to a Mazda Demio :P
Q. Re your tattoo saga further up this page. How do you manage shower fun with the D3 tape? Do you only cover the tattoo in bookings?
The tape is waterproof :) And no, it's covered outside of bookings too. The only time it's uncovered is when I'm in the shower at home, and after I get out of the shower I change out the tape. D3 tape is great because it 1) covers the soul destroyingly embarrassing (not even exaggerating sadly) tattoo and 2) Helps optimise healing + reduces swelling after laser sessions. In short, D3 is my bitch.
Feelin' spendy? Click here, lover.
Q. What sounds are pleasing to your ear?
In no particular order: The sound of a laser machine zapping the ever loving shit out of my botched tattoo. Guitar solo in Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb" approx 4:31 in. Pagani Huayra startup and rev. Sounds from the various spool up stages of a RR Trent 900 jet engine. Oh, and the sound of my natural DD tiddies slapping together as I relentlessly ride your (ideally rock hard) D. Chyeaaahhh
Q. Do you like Indian food?
Yes, very much. Fucks with my IBS to no end, but oh so worth it!
Q. How did you get onto The Beatles?
Was wagging school one day and went through my Mum's CD collection. Saw an album called "Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band", wondered what the heck it was. Had vaguely heard of The Beatles but could only name one member - Ringo Starr - and that was due to his narration of Thomas The Tank Engine. Listened to the CD and was blown away, and immediately went on a mission to download all their albums off Limewire. I also made a Yahoo! group for The Beatles, and through it I met other teens around the world who were just as Beatle mad as I was.
Many years later, as Gemma Rose, I was able to afford to see Paul McCartney live in Auckland 2017, as well as going to Abbey Road in London, and doing the Magical Mystery Tour in Liverpool. You guys made this possible for me and I can't thank you enough.
Q. Do you get asked for natural services often?
A: You know, I actually don't. (Which is great!)
Q. Which laser are you using?
A: On my current fuck up? The technician is using a Quanta Q Plus C Evo. A cryo thingy is used at the beginning, then the laser, and lastly a fractional laser to speed up recovery and remove scarring. The previous laser at the other place was a little red box with no naming/branding on it.
Q. Got kids?
Definitely no kids...I'm childfree by choice, have never felt inclined/compelled to have kids
Q. Worst paying job?
Gemma Rose: Independent Escort every January + February haha. Although I must say February 2021 was surprisingly decent.
Q. I'd love to show you some of my favourite TV shows, but I'm not sure what sort of TV you like?
Mate, if you have a favourite TV show you'd like to watch with me then it shall be done! It doesn't matter if you feel our tastes don't align.
Anyway, you did ask what I like, so.... (drum roll please, Ringo)
TV shows I enjoy/have enjoyed include Coronation Street, The Crown, Coronation Street, Downton Abbey, Home and Away (yeah yeah), The OC, Coronation Street, You, Eastenders, Beverly Hills 90210, Melrose Place, Coronation Street, Bad Girls, Footballer's Wives, Coronation Street (not sure if I've mentioned that already?), Dark, Pretty Little Liars, Wentworth and many others. Also Coronation Street as I feel I've left that out.
I'm sure my taste in TV has given you the stitch - once you've stopped laughing email me back and tell me what you like! I'm always up for watching new things ;)
Q. How about movies?
Too many, too many. Anything starring Bette Davis or Clint Eastwood. My favourite Bette Davis movies would be Whatever Happened To Baby Jane, In This Our Life, Now Voyager, All About Eve, Jezebel. My favourite Clint Eastwood movies include The Good The Bad and The Ugly trilogy, the Dirty Harry series, Gran Torino, Play Misty For Me, The Outlaw Josey Wales....so many, dude, so many.
Other favourite movies include The Shawshank Redemption, Poltergeist 1+2, It (original), Friday 13th series, A Nightmare on Elm Street series, Schindler's List, The Green Mile, Kevin and Perry Go Large, Final Destination series, The Rain Man, Stepbrothers, The Pianist, honestly I could be here all day! Too many. I'm pretty easy with movies although I'm generally not a fan of romance/romcom/chick flicks.
Q. Are you a native Wellingtonian?
No, I'm from Palmerston North, by way of Glasgow Scotland.
Q. Do you play any other games or just Asphalt?
Not really, anymore.
I used to hang around at Time Out in the Palmy BK on Broadway Ave, playing Street Fighter followed by a Hawaiian BK Chicken burger, back when they used to cut them in half and they cost $6.40.
Burnout 3+4 / NFS on X Box back in the day.
Mobile phone wise, I used to play Pokemon Go for a bit, back when it first came out (2016?). I played legitimately for a couple of months before I started cheating using a GPS spoofer so I could catch perfect IV Pokemon located all around the world, with the precise co-ordinates listed on a Discord channel.
Dude, I had a fuckin' ARMY of PERFECT Dragonites, Snorlaxes, Lapras, Gyarados...
Obviously cheating ruined the experience and I stopped playing sometime in 2016.
Q. Don't you like cider anymore. You used to mention it all the time and now you don't.
Hahaha, seems like I've finally been called out on this!
I rode the cider train for well over a year and then lockdown hit, and cider was one of the many things I decided to ditch. Now I don't really care for it anymore...I mean, hell, I'll drink it, it'd be rude not to, but I have gone back to my old favourite drink of choice, gin! I've also taken to craft beer but dear God does it knock me for six.
Q. Are you into Shakespeare? I have a hunch you are!
Sorry matey, no, I just can't vibe with the bard.
Stayed 2 nights in Stratford-upon-Avon in November 2018, but not for Shakespearean purposes. Loved the ice cream parlour